Registered: 1308117535 Posts: 943
Reply with quote #1
This is a problem that I've been ignoring for some time now... When it happens I usually shrug it off and move on to the next encounter.
I live a very active sex life so "blowing it" by not getting hard never really bothered me all too much because I know within a few days there'd be someone else in my bed. I usually don't even get embarrassed by it which likely fucks with the woman's head a bit (thinking its her fault or something) but it is what it is. I'm starting to realize, looking back, that its a bigger problem than I thought. Let me explain. Basically I'd say about 25% to 33% of new encounters with women result in maybe at best a 50% erection. Looking back at even last month for example this amounts to around 3 or 4 "failed" encounters. I even blew my load with one (oral) with a 50% erection... that was interesting... I feel like, at 26 years old, this is happening far more than it should be (should it even happen at all?) My diet is pretty solid and I'm pretty fit. I don't even drink anymore and I never made a habit of smoking weed. I do know my dad struggled with ED since his late 30s or so and he was really fit and healthy... could this be a result of genetics? my lifestyle? (ie, random sex, not all that exciting... lots of 6.5's or 7's (basically sex for the sake of sex)). I do watch a fair amount of porn, but its not daily anymore. I just can't figure it out... Should I just try to get a script for Viagra or Cialus? Will a doc even consider that? I know that's the easy way out, but I'm tired of this and worried it will only get worse and not better with time. Also, I am Canadian and many many of the sites you Americans or Europeans get the ED drugs off without a script will not ship to Canada for some reason... trust me, I've checked. Kinda frustrated here really...
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Registered: 1306863440 Posts: 3,671
Reply with quote #2
The fact it doesn't happen all the time suggests there is nothing physically wrong.
I think the issue that you are experiencing is a common product of our times. In my late 20's I started experiencing the same thing. I spoke to friends about it and the same thing was happening with many of them. More and more we see young men suffering from ED and I honestly think it's due to modern society being so sexualized that there is little or no thrill to it. It's not just porn, but the ease with which sex is available these days and the we speak about it so much. There is no more mystery or excitement to it. If you get Viagra or Cialis, it will almost certainly solve your problems. But the route cause will still be there. I remember you spoke of using escorts, watching porn and you are a good pick up artist it would seem. Given the extreme ease for you to achieve sexual gratification, it makes sense that after a while it might lose some of the thrill, to the point you are just going through the motions. It might even explain the need to keep getting bigger.
Registered: 1409409023 Posts: 135
Reply with quote #3
Firstly - in Europe you need a prescription for Viagra and/or Cialis and funnily enough I managed to order them online from Canada as I did not want to go to a doctor. Secondly - the problem seems to be the frequent encounters with different partners. I noticed in the past that first time it never was ideal and although fully hard initially, it went soft during the action. That made me nervous and actually almost impossible to have one night stands. I have a partner for last 10 years and strangely enough it happens on some very few occasions which I explain as simply thinking about the 'performance' too much ahead which takes all the fun away. So my mind is playing tricks on me. UD
Registered: 1309660183 Posts: 855
Reply with quote #4
If your constantly watching porn or jacking off to porn that can be the source of your problem. I'm almost 100% sure your ED is due to porn. It's common to guys our age. Google "your brain on porn".
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Registered: 1356925240 Posts: 484
Reply with quote #5
Registered: 1403307688 Posts: 100
Reply with quote #6
I think all of the responses so far are good, but I would like to offer a slightly different perspective. It is entirely possible that what you are experiencing is predominately psychological, a result of burnout, overconsumption of porn, etc. Nevertheless, I think it needs to be maintained that there is such a thing as organic, physiological erectile dysfunction, and it is not necessarily a product of age or disease. Also, erectile dysfunction needs to be thought of as lying on a spectrum and not a binary. It's too simplistic to say that one either has ED or not, or that all manifestations will mean the same thing or point to the same underlying causes. The trouble is that almost no one who has some kind of ED will not also have, at the very least, a corresponding psychological issue. This does not mean, then, that the psychologically associated difficulties are the primary cause.
What many people do not take into consideration is that the size, appearance, and functioning of penises is largely(ha) determined genetically. People often use the plumbing metaphor to think of erectile health. It's a matter of tubes supplying blood, so as long as the tubes are clean and the blood is flowing, dicks are hard and all is well. What is overlooked is the health of erectile tissue itself. The healthy tissue of the cavernosa expands rapidly and pinches off an extremely intricate network of veins that carry blood out of the penis and back towards the heart. If this tissue is in an any way compromised, ie is fibrotic, then the expansion and shunting process will be impaired. Now the condition of the erectile tissue and the venous system that filters blood out of the penis is mostly determined, as I mentioned before, at the genetic level. Saying this is not saying that, at the same time, lifestyle does not play a major role, and that your functioning can't be improved by certain healthy habits. This is to say, nevertheless, that it can actually be helpful to think of it the way we think of many other organic disorders: you can be genetically predisposed to certain degenerative processes that set in with a pace and severity that depend on the specific genetic endowment that makes up an individual. So some men can live their whole lives and never experience ED, and others are pretty much born with it in one stroke(ha again). Sometimes tissue degeneration sets in in a man's twenties, or thirties, or much later. I'm saying all of this to in some way corroborate what others have said here, and to provide a little background information on my interpretation (very loose, I'm an artist and not a doctor or scientist) of what could be happening. Maybe you are genetically predisposed to losing some functioning around this time in your life. You are by no means alone in this; it doesn't necessarily mean that something else is wrong physically or psychologically, though it certainly could mean that. Not every man is hard all the time, whenever he wants, and just because he isn't, it doesn't mean that there is another issue. It often does mean that, but it needs to be pointed out that more location specific disorders are possible, though they might not be common.
Registered: 1396571021 Posts: 13
Reply with quote #7
All the above posts seem to be very solid. The only thing I would add would be to ask you if you are waking up in the morning with wood or if you are noticing you have erections during the night at various times? If so, the things you are mentioning that are bothering you may very well be psychological in nature. However, I see no issues with you - even at your age - asking your physician for a prescription. I know MANY guys who have either Viagra or Cialis (myself included) on hand for those times when they may have had too much to drink or are a bit nervous with someone new and want to make sure they can seal the deal. BTW there is also what's called 'daily cialis' - 5mg that you can take every day with your other meds and that seems to have received decent reviews. I'm sure someone on here may be on that regimen and can pipe in on that. Good luck to you Sizemic.
Registered: 1308117535 Posts: 943
Reply with quote #8
Thanks guys for the advice.
I tend to agree... it must be psychological since I definitely usually have great morning wood. I should honestly take a month off of sexual things and maybe "reset" myself... easier said than done. But I'm sure it would be a super productive month!
Registered: 1386947053 Posts: 1,365
Reply with quote #9
If you don't have any other issues (weight gain, bad sleep, bad mood, tired, or difficulty concentrating) then it's probably limited to just psychological ED. If there's more, it could be thyroid or testosterone related.
I started having similar things to what you described around 25, btw. It's important that you mentioned you have good morning wood, cuz I didn't - and it was an early warning sign that things were going wrong. __________________
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Registered: 1452927727 Posts: 1
Reply with quote #10
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Registered: 1452463082 Posts: 363
Reply with quote #11
Ed is very common. If you worry about it the psychological aspect of it spirals. Use medication and that's all.
However, viagra and cialis will not give you an erection when you want it because it needs your own arousal (erection?) to start with, have to be taken in advance, does not always work and their effects taper off with time. Also, they have side effects that deteriorate to hypertension and further ED over time.
What is needed, I think, by all men with ED are the spontaenous (whether you want or not) drugs like Caverject, Trimix etc. which are mainly effective,unfortunately, when injected into the poor member. With these, the EQ and length of time of erection are calculated for the doses.There are other kinds like MUSE which are forced through the urethra etc. All of these are somewhat painful, though,but many of the men using them don't give a damn so long as they get what they want. A fact is, there are no cures for whatever type of ED (despite what are being said about that) and though we try to console ourselves with this or that reason, IT IS HUMILIATING,EMBARRASING AND LOSS OF FACE when we can't "get it up".
Registered: 1330024914 Posts: 536
Reply with quote #12
For what it is worth, I noticed that the "horny" wire can get crossed with the "bored", "angry", "lonely" wires with people who have lots of sex. Have sex with a few people that you are really into and see if this happens. Sex can end up just being something to do, in which case you may not have good erection quality. I used to be able to tell by how I felt after the sex. If I felt worse it meant I was just having sex not to deal with the real emotion.. I noticed this one night many years ago when I was at a sex party and with a very hot guy and couldn't get it up. I realized all at once I went out not because i was horny, but I was lonely and wanted something to do and this wasn't cutting it - it was just my go to behavior.
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Registered: 1521134292 Posts: 8
Reply with quote #13
Have you like, tried therapy?
If you say you have good woods in the morning that means that there is nothing physically wrong with you. Ask for help, don't be shy. I don't think any of us here is qualified to give you any advice on the matter, we all have dicks and our own problems but that doesn't makes us expersts on the matter. I'm on my mid 20s and never had ED during sexual intercourse, however I have masturbated with a 50% erection just because i was bored, not even horny. Heal your mind and soul before jumping to conclusions ortaking any pills.
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Registered: 1462210463 Posts: 272
Reply with quote #14
meditation, relaxation, internal focus and self exploration finding your homeostasis...
Registered: 1458742092 Posts: 409
Reply with quote #15
Lots of great advice here - just what the forum should be.
If you have looked into the other things like cutting out porn, having the sex holiday (um, like the opposite of the usual sex holiday) and maybe seen a doctor before you look at medication try the Low intensity shock wave therapy. Google it, check the gains wave site (I don't have that machine). We have found it helpful, often combined with PRP - so bit hard to know which one is giving the most improvement. __________________ What ever you do, make sure it is safe. Google calibreclinic