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Heimdall

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Posts: 126
Reply with quote  #1 
Hi all,

I have been ready to "jump" on the PMMA train for about a year now. The only reason I've not done it yet is my gf who heavily opposes the procedure. She has a strong opinion and mind-set that "everything will go straigth to hell" and my "dick would be useless, mutilated and deformed" after the procedure and I'd be willing to end my life because of it.

I've been trying to explain that there are multiple ways of getting into this. Some guys want to get freakishly-big monster size and fastest way it is possible. Of course this is the most certain way to get into trouble with PMMA. My goals are actually pretty modest in my opinion and I prefer to do it in a slow & careful way rather than quick & dirty. My mid-section girth is 4.5 to 4.7 inches and my end goal would be 5.5 to 5.7 inches in girth.

I know what I am going in for and I've done my reading about the subject of PMMA. I am completely ok if there are going to be some aesthetic "issues" because of the procedure, I am really after the girth which would give me peace of mind on this subject. The way I've planned my journey is that I'd go through it in a very moderate way. This means that all the rounds will be done with 10% and absolutely no more than 20cc's per session, I think 15cc would be enough actually. 

This is absolutely killing me since I've been very insecure about my penile girth since elementary school. This year I'll be turning to 30yo and would really like to get this off my back. This has been the number one anxiety and low-self esteem source for me so god damn long. I've been also on a psychotherapy 1+ year due my low self-esteem problems and things that have happened years ago. We're also touched the penis size subject with my therapist. I know myself enough to know that this is not going to go away if there is no concrete actions done (which PMMA would be).

I have always been self-councious about my dick. Everytime I have to go to gym shower or something like that it kills me mentally to know that I am below average girth. Especially when I've got the length (BPEL 7.75-8 inches). My penis is basicly the model example of a needle dick. Lots of length but no girth at all.

Any ideas how to deal with this and how to explain to her so that this really is something I am ready to go through and the risks are relatively low when doing it in a moderate and cautious way with good after-care?

__________________
---------------------------------------
BPEL: 18cm -> 20,5cm (six year period on and off PE)
NBPEL: 19cm
BEG: 14,5cm
MEG: 11,5cm -> 12,5-13cm (1st round, 15cl @ 10%, Dr. N.)
0
CPW

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Posts: 497
Reply with quote  #2 
Welcome Heildall,

There is always risks with any surgery so your GF is right there.  But....

   [1] With your length and your mentality going in you'll be fine.

   [2] It's your dick not hers.  Just saying.

   [3] Is she going to be your wife someday?  Big difference.

   [4] Even if you decide not to do it your size is fine already.  So it's not big deal.

CPW


__________________
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
MSEG:   PrePMMA: 5.5"   Post RD 1: 6.0"   Post RD 2: 6.5"  Post RD 3: 7.0"

Checkout my progress here:

http://phalloboards.websitetoolbox.com/post/taking-the-plunge-pmma-with-dr-casavantes-7582191?&trail=15

0
indiano123

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PhalloBoards 500
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Posts: 1,126
Reply with quote  #3 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Heimdall
Hi all,

I have been ready to "jump" on the PMMA train for about a year now. The only reason I've not done it yet is my gf who heavily opposes the procedure. She has a strong opinion and mind-set that "everything will go straigth to hell" and my "dick would be useless, mutilated and deformed" after the procedure and I'd be willing to end my life because of it.

I've been trying to explain that there are multiple ways of getting into this. Some guys want to get freakishly-big monster size and fastest way it is possible. Of course this is the most certain way to get into trouble with PMMA. My goals are actually pretty modest in my opinion and I prefer to do it in a slow & careful way rather than quick & dirty. My mid-section girth is 4.5 to 4.7 inches and my end goal would be 5.5 to 5.7 inches in girth.

I know what I am going in for and I've done my reading about the subject of PMMA. I am completely ok if there are going to be some aesthetic "issues" because of the procedure, I am really after the girth which would give me peace of mind on this subject. The way I've planned my journey is that I'd go through it in a very moderate way. This means that all the rounds will be done with 10% and absolutely no more than 20cc's per session, I think 15cc would be enough actually. 

This is absolutely killing me since I've been very insecure about my penile girth since elementary school. This year I'll be turning to 30yo and would really like to get this off my back. This has been the number one anxiety and low-self esteem source for me so god damn long. I've been also on a psychotherapy 1+ year due my low self-esteem problems and things that have happened years ago. We're also touched the penis size subject with my therapist. I know myself enough to know that this is not going to go away if there is no concrete actions done (which PMMA would be).

I have always been self-councious about my dick. Everytime I have to go to gym shower or something like that it kills me mentally to know that I am below average girth. Especially when I've got the length (BPEL 7.75-8 inches). My penis is basicly the model example of a needle dick. Lots of length but no girth at all.

Any ideas how to deal with this and how to explain to her so that this really is something I am ready to go through and the risks are relatively low when doing it in a moderate and cautious way with good after-care?


If your so worried about pmma then just get something temporary like ha.
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Swapzor

Contributing Member
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Posts: 80
Reply with quote  #4 
Try some manual PE first, like pumping, it will give you atleast very temporary results (for up to one hour mb). If you both like the larger girth you could take the next step in thinking about a procedure. Or just contuine manual PE.
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Heimdall

Centurion
Registered:
Posts: 126
Reply with quote  #5 
Hello and thank you for your answers!

CPW:

[1] With your length and your mentality going in you'll be fine.
- This is my own opinion too.
- I know there are risks BUT I am ready take the risk (which is in my opinion relatively low IF the procedure is approached with reasonable expectations (minor imperfections), low enough concentrate+volume and overall careful base work)

[3] Is she going to be your wife someday?  Big difference.
- I hope so, but this really is a subject where I am ready to be "selfish" if it has to be so. I would LOVE to get her understand why I am considering the procedure and what it really means to ME and my self-esteem.
- The lack of girth has been eating me from inside since the beginning of my puberty and there honestly haven't been even a days break to this in the past ~15 years.

[4] Even if you decide not to do it your size is fine already.  So it's not big deal.
- I know it won't bother nobody else on this whole planet than myself. I really have a strong intuition that this would be the missing puzzle-piece to help me finally accept myself.



__________________
---------------------------------------
BPEL: 18cm -> 20,5cm (six year period on and off PE)
NBPEL: 19cm
BEG: 14,5cm
MEG: 11,5cm -> 12,5-13cm (1st round, 15cl @ 10%, Dr. N.)
0
Heimdall

Centurion
Registered:
Posts: 126
Reply with quote  #6 
indiano123:
 
If your so worried about pmma then just get something temporary like ha.
 

- As I wrote I am not the one who is so worried. It's my GF who has the overcautious and "all will definetely go to hell" -mentality over the procedure. And besides, I'm more after a permanent solution rather than temporary.

Swapzor:
Try some manual PE first, like pumping, it will give you atleast very temporary results (for up to one hour mb). If you both like the larger girth you could take the next step in thinking about a procedure. Or just contuine manual PE.

- Already tried with some results. My PE "journey" has lasted about 7 years or so. Started with manual exercises, then pumping and briefly tried hanging too. Got some girth (about 2cm or 0.75 inches) but girth seems to be much more difficult. My best efforts have given me at MOST 0.3 inches of more girth over the years.
- Sure when I pump I can get close to the 12 to 12.5cm ballpark but this really is not the long term answer anymore. I want to be able to completely LEAVE this matter behind me. 15 years of pain and 7 years of trying to do everything I can and basicly gotten to nowhere. This why I am after the permanent solution.

Peace of mind, finally. If there are going to be some imperfections or aesthetic issues I am ready to accept it.
Based on my reading and studying over the matter there really shouldn't be anything too drastic if the concentration is kept at 10% and overall volume per round doesn't jump to massive amounts.



__________________
---------------------------------------
BPEL: 18cm -> 20,5cm (six year period on and off PE)
NBPEL: 19cm
BEG: 14,5cm
MEG: 11,5cm -> 12,5-13cm (1st round, 15cl @ 10%, Dr. N.)
0
hoddle10

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Premier Donor
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Posts: 3,700
Reply with quote  #7 
A 1" gain in girth isn't a modest goal. It's a big gain, but because of some the massive gains we've seen by members of the forum, it's got to the point where a 1" gain may be regarded as modest. If you are looking for anything over 0.5"-0.75" in gain, the I think you need to regard your goals as having an elevated risk of aesthetic complications. 
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jogift

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Posts: 356
Reply with quote  #8 
hoddle, are the elevated risks only for aesthetics? No scarring leading to necrosis, no hardness of lumps affecting EQ, curvature etc. These are the areas where there are no clear answers on the forum - even if I might not be bothered about the looks, might some hard lump obstruct the blood flow to the carvanosa affecting EQ or press on the veins, restricting draining and lead to necrosis etc. ...
0
indiano123

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PhalloBoards 500
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Posts: 1,126
Reply with quote  #9 
Honestly man when you do stufflike tbis there's always a chance things can wrong, but with pmma i know you can get a kenalog shot, use dmso, and use micro drops also although lumps amd nodules may look ugly, it will be like your studded and make your girl feel even more pleasure.
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jogift

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Reply with quote  #10 
Honestly bro, I won't mind a few nodules etc. for her pleasure. Just wondering what else they,re doing in there! I think Heimdall's chick is wondering about that too - possibly she's reading on here and having her shit scared out of her, worse still not finding "clear" answers to these issues raised ...
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mike81

Contributing Member
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Posts: 70
Reply with quote  #11 
Post some erect pics. I'm curious to see what 7.75 length with 4.7 girth looks like.

Tell your GF to keep quiet or pack her shit and leave. The last thing you need is some hyped up broad telling you your dicks gonna be forever mangled when your already doing the balancing act of keeping your shit together with a penis your insecure about and the stress of a pmma procedure in your future.

Sounds like she's jealous that your improving your self-esteem.
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Heimdall

Centurion
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Posts: 126
Reply with quote  #12 
Quote:
Originally Posted by hoddle10
A 1" gain in girth isn't a modest goal. It's a big gain, but because of some the massive gains we've seen by members of the forum, it's got to the point where a 1" gain may be regarded as modest. If you are looking for anything over 0.5"-0.75" in gain, the I think you need to regard your goals as having an elevated risk of aesthetic complications. 


If 0.5"-0.75" gain is "all I can get without raising any unnecessary risks" then that'll be it. Whatever the gain I get from lets say three rounds of PMMA is enough to me. I think I am going to be more happy about my penis if it gets bigger - no matter how much in in any measurable units. Consequence from me being more happy about my penis helps me being happier about me.

After all this shouldn't be about a specific numberic 'goal' where to land. More like a life improvement. Just like you should stop trying to make an effort to improve YOURSELF to make you the best 'you you can be'. Everybody of us can't be olympic gold medalists because of our genetics, resources, possible genetic weaknesses etc. are the limiting factor. You can still improve you. And that is where I want to invest my efforts and resources.

So in the end I am happy if I gain - something - no matter how. It's an improvement for me. An improvement which can help me defeat my anxiety over my penis. It really has been a burden to me for the past 15 years. I think it has something to do with my height - a feature I have no control what so ever. I am 5'7" so basicly I have always been the one who could be labeled "That one short guy in the room" if you'd look the situation from the surveillance tape footage. Those are not the best in the picture qualitywise but you can spot peoples height and that kind of things. The one's that make a first impression of a person.

Ok you get the point. no matter what has been the occasion 95% percent of 'em I've been the shortest guy in the room. Work, School, Bar, you name it. It really is not that big of a deal for me anymore but it's been a struggle. The therapy where I've been going for over a year from now has helped me to understand that there is no point to stress over a thing or quality about yourself if you have no control over it.

But penis size is something I have "some control". 

__________________
---------------------------------------
BPEL: 18cm -> 20,5cm (six year period on and off PE)
NBPEL: 19cm
BEG: 14,5cm
MEG: 11,5cm -> 12,5-13cm (1st round, 15cl @ 10%, Dr. N.)
0
supa

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Reply with quote  #13 
You have a great girlfriend, Mr Heimdall.

I could wager money that she is not from the US.


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"Large is the intellect, narrow is the world: thoughts have no difficulty in subsisting side by side with each other, but things clash roughly together in space."
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Reklaw

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Reply with quote  #14 
"The therapy where I've been going for over a year from now has helped me to understand that there is no point to stress over a thing or quality about yourself if you have no control over it.
But penis size is something you have 'some control' "

I can see your point that it's easy to get over something you have no control over. Sometimes I wonder if I'd be happier if I New for a fact the was absolutely no way to enlarge the penis, and there were literally no options available because I think my mind would adjust to the reality and I'd just get stuck in and make the best with what I've got, but because there are options it kind of keeps you clinging on to this fantasy and slightly ludicrous idea of having a large penis.
There's something addictive about it as well, like if I knew what I know now prior to having a procedure I'd probably be able to say no, but since I had a procedure that didn't go to plan and that I've spent the last 2 years thinking about it, it's like I'm at the point of no return and there's something inside me that won't let the idea go, and I don't think il stop until I've either destroyed my penis or I've successfully enlarged it.
It traps you in this crazy cycle.
For me at least I think the psychology behind it is that because I've invested so much thought, time, efffort, money into this idea I don't view it as something that's worth giving up and feel as though I have no choice but to continue.
Once you've had Phalloplasty there is no going back.
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jogift

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Posts: 356
Reply with quote  #15 
Beautiful philosophies. The effort required towards penis size, over which we have "some control" is way above the things for which we should not stress ourselves, like education or being a footballer. The reality is that if poor guys didn't stress themselves then we won't have rich guys! And worse still, we are all here because we are sick in the head ...
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