darkstaff
I wanted to start a post that I could add to as I deal with my PMMA complications.

I got 10cc of 10% and 11cc of 20% in June of 2012

I figured my GF got awesome breat implants, why not do something for myself.

I've known I was small since high school... and there were times in my adult life that once the woman saw my junk, she wanted nothing more to do with me.

I did minor research, found this board, and saw all the wonderful results that PMMA could deliver. I

I made my trip and went, without even telling my girlfriend.

The surgery was fine, and both Dr C and Wade are amazing in terms of their friendliness and professionalism. Even more than what you normally find in the US at a good doctor's office. 

Anyways, about a month after the surgery, I had some rough sex with my girlfriend, and boy did my junk SWELL up and hurt. 

I had to come up with ways of trying to cool it off as it was on Fire.. and painful to the touch. I asked Dr C what to do, and the response was 400mg of IBPROFEN daily until it goes down.

That worked... the swelling went down. I also noticed that the Penis would swell large after sex, which I liked.. and I did like my new size.

Fast Forward to December... after a hard masturbation session, my penis developed a large mass on the right side near the base of the penis. The entire penis was a result was very swollen.

Now, just to be clear - I was not erect, on Ambien and I masterbated without enjoyment because I believe the Ambien had me just 'not right in the head'

I could have potentially damaged my penis during this episode... well let's say I definitely did.

It was very swollen the next day .. after 2 weeks of swelling I asked Dr C what to do, and was instructed to try 600mg of IBPROFEN. After about 2 weeks, nothing was working, so then I was instructed to do a 20 unit Kenalog shot interleasionly in the center mass of the bump.

I went to my General Practioner to ask for this shot... he looked at me like I was crazy. And also was completely shocked what I went and did in TJ... I left that appointment disheartened, lost and a castaway in the united states medical system.

I then went to a Dermatologist, and was also refused treatment with a kenalog shot, or anything.

I was in so much pain at this point, I was desperate for help.

I went to GNC and bought $100 of some anti-inflmation medication.. didn't help.

I scrambled through the internet to find anyone... I called one, and asked the receptionist if they performed kenalog shots... she confirmed they did... so I went to this dermatologist, who was blown away by the PMMA procedure I explained to him. He made the comment that he had another person that had problems for 12 years with Artecol injections in the face, and continued to this day to have problems... and could not believe I had it injected into my penis. I pleaded with him to give me something for my discomfort, and told him I was already turned down twice that day from other doctors, and that is why I called ahead to get confirmation that they did this type of procedure. That got me a 1cc Kenalog shot in the butt. I didn't notice any improvement however, so I called and moved up my Urologist appointment to the next morning.

The bump went down the next morning as I saw the urologist, to the point where he didn't see the swelling.

I explained to him the procedure I underwent, and like all the other doctors he was visibly shaken. 

I asked if it could be removed, he was busy reading the PMMA materials I had handed him to read, and his remark was a little unsettling "They are microspheres -- what would you do if they got caught in your heart -- nothing, there is nothing you can do"

I then said "Should I be worried?"

He said "I never want any of my patients to ever be worried" ... (as he continued to read)

He refused the Kenalog shot claiming that it was very dangerous and could cause a lot of complications. He spent about an hour with me, as he was somewhat empathtic to my dire situation. I explained to him the pain I was undergoing, and he told me the best was weather the strorm, and if its some sort of granuloma, hopefully it will harden to the point we could take it out... 

He suggested I come back in 2 weeks for a follow-up.

The next few days, I didn't know what to do. I felt trapped... here I was with a procedure done in TJ and there seemed like no doctor really knew what to do to help me...

I began to think suicidal thoughts like "Well worse comes to worse, I can just kill myself, that will get me out of this"

Or "If I told my parents what I was going through, they would have heart attacks and die, or stress out, and they are in their golden years, how could I ever live with myself with that... best if I just kill myself, this pain is unbearable"

The swelling came back ... and after 2 days of constant burning pain around the base of my penis, and urethral pain from the inflammation, I couldn't stand it any longer, and called the urologist again... I pleaded for help. They said that the doctor was in an operation, but they would page him... I had done some research online about urethral pain and asked if I could get a prescription for Phenazopyrid ... which they did.. and that provided some relief. They also were able to get me into see the doctor 8:30am the next morning.

I found some relief in hot baths/hot tubs... so I literally lived in them.

I was up at 5am the next morning in agony from the feeling that someone was pulling the head of my penis, and would not let go, and there was nothing I could do to stop it... so I took a Phenazopyrid to help ... it did a little, but the pain was still there... 

A side note: You wonder how they get a bull to go crazy during bull riding events? .. its cause they tie a rope around their privates causing pain. This is the type of pain I was in... crazy on fire can't escape pain.

So I get to my urologist early... he brings me in.

He inspects me, noticed that my lymph nodes are swollen, and notices my penis is now considerably more swollen than last time. He says to me during the inspection

"Yes, there is definitely some sort of foreign body reaction going on here" ... and the continues

"I think your also in the process of building up sometype of scar tissue, best is if we let it heal and let the Foriegn Body harden, then decide what to do then, including excising it if we need to"

I pleaded with him to let me have the Kenalog shot for immediate relief. He replied that they shouldn't be used if we can avoid it. The swelling usually comes back like it was before and has some considerable side effects.

I agree to try... 

So since then I've been doing whatever I can to get my mind off the pain and suffering when it flares its ugly head.

I started a journal that I write into, what time/date for each entry, what I'm feeling, then I measure from 0 (best) to 10 (worst) in 4 areas: my urethral pain, base penis burning pain, overall swelling, and chest pain. I also keep a record of my heart rate and blood pressure for each entry. I write down what is going on, how I am feeling ... and any other things I might want to ask the doctor about that come to mind while I'm experiencing the pain. I do this because I simply have nothing else I can do to get my mind off the discomfort... 

Besides the Phenazopyrid, I don't really have anything else that helps the pain level. Ibprofen doesnt help, and I've tried a whole boatload of anti-inflammatory drugs, that just don't do anything.

Again, the biggest problem is that it leaves you with a horrible manic / panic feeling of being trapped.

Trapped by a decision that you made 6 months ago that slightly increased your penis girth, but left you with a physiological and physically painful life.. at least thats how it feels now.

I know I'll always ... always ... always be scared of having sex going forward, because I never want this pain to occur again.

I'm most likely not going to be able to have sex for months until whatever is causing the inflammation is fixed --- that is IF IT CAN BE... 

The mental aspects of this are beyond words. I constantly hit myself over the head on why I made such a stupid, decision. 

... so here I am ... pissing red/orange due to the Phenazopyrid. Not able to put in a full day of work. Scared constantly. and for what?

.... 
I'll add more in phase 2 ... I'll update after my next urologist appointment next Monday.

With tears
Dark


PMMA procedure on June 2012
Inflammatory reaction required removal.
Penis current state: RECOVERED from complete PMMA removal via deglove on March 11th

Length is back, slight divot on the right side base where mass was removed, but other than that, very healthy penis
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Snoopy
Hello Dark, I am heartbroken by your story. I am so glad you posted though, as it has convinced me pmma is not the right decision for me. . Thank you so much for helping me understand what happens when things do not work out as planned. Please be strong and remember time is on your side.

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carljohnson
Your story is hard to read for someone who is supposed to get on a plane for this procedure in a week.   But thank you for your honesty, it is greatly appreciated.

Regarding suicide, I can't imagine how troublesome this must be, but please know there are people here to talk to and things are very likely to get better at some point.  You think the procedure left you feeling "Trapped by a decision that you made 6 months ago"...well suicide is a lot more permanent than that and your friends, family and loved ones would be trapped with a second bad (far worse) decision if you give up.  Please think of that when you feel depressed about this situation.  And let me know if you'd like to talk in private.  I know we don't know each other but I'm a good listener and sounding board.

I'm curious, could you elaborate on '
hard masturbation session'?  I mean what was so 'hard' about it?  Just for an extended period of time, or were you literally rough with it in some manner?  I on't understand that part. 

Things will get better.
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Hans
This scares me to no end.So do you still get erections?Do these increase the pain?

All the best.Hopefully there is a cure to this.
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kcchief
Thank you for sharing.
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darkstaff

Carl -- I was on ambien and I masturbated while not being erect for about 20 mins... I remember I hurt my unit doing that.. 

Thanks guys.

There is a whole other part of this story, which includes my heart going into AFIB in November.

I'm hoping (my cardioglist as well) that it was due to stomach infection called H.pylori which I was diagnosed with on Jan 4th. Since then I took a very hard regiment of antibodics called a PREVPAC

I'm still having chest pain, I'm hoping it's related to the stomach issues... and my stomach is just healing... but my mind has been in that dark area since November that somehow the chest pain and AFIB are related to the PMMA ... but most likely not.

I just went outside and played a few rounds of golf -- first time in since November. (I live on a golf course) ... and my penis was doing ok ... he hurt as I walked but I just ignored it... now its red and inflamed .. so I probably wont do that again.

My next steps:

1. Find out if I can get a MRI of my upper chest area for my own mental comfort
2. Also try and get a MRI of the penis area to at least show us where we are today (something to measure against in the future)
3. Continue to leave my happy alone completely...
4. Try and get back focused at work
5. Talk to urologist about flying out to LA to see Dr. Gelman for a consult
6. Get a counselor to talk to about my depression

Thanks all
Dark

PMMA procedure on June 2012
Inflammatory reaction required removal.
Penis current state: RECOVERED from complete PMMA removal via deglove on March 11th

Length is back, slight divot on the right side base where mass was removed, but other than that, very healthy penis
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darkstaff
Ok so I've stated the UGLY...

Now time for the GOOD.

When I first got this new size, I was amazed how fast my Girlfriend got wet...

I remember having sex for the 1st time after the procedure, and looking down at the bed sheets seeing them covered with her cum... it was amazing.

Also, I could fill her up ... and it felt amazing... 

Also the look and feel of the penis was extremely natural feeling... it didn't feel artificial at all.

I think she liked it too ... she likes to say I was fine before hand, but always like to slip in "but the PMMA it does feel good! "

...

Dark

PMMA procedure on June 2012
Inflammatory reaction required removal.
Penis current state: RECOVERED from complete PMMA removal via deglove on March 11th

Length is back, slight divot on the right side base where mass was removed, but other than that, very healthy penis
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UncleJJ
Darkstaff.....Tears for you....Keep looking forward past the moment.....Best to you.
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darkstaff
I edited my original post making sure it was clear that I really beat my penis up the night before this swelling started.

So if anything guys with PMMA .. I don't suggest masterbating while not being erect, while on Ambien.

Also, my reaction to the swelling was a little neurotic in a lot of ways.

If you guys look at my posts, you'll see some of the desperation.. 

But I think I have a logical explanation. My H.pylori infection in my stomach that started 2 months before my inflammation problem I'm dealing with has a interesting side-effect of causing major depression, fatigue, and "fogginess of the mind".

It starts with key nutrient deficiency derived from the H.pylori.

http://ezinearticles.com/?How-Can-H-Pylori-Cause-Anxiety-and-Depression?&id=3545128

There is actually a video about it on youtube



This plus my inability to deal with my girlfriends autistic son who lives with us.. and you get a triple whammy.

It's actually a quadruple whammy due to the amount of stress I deal with at work.

So over the last few months I've had one of the biggest challenges of my life. I latched onto PMMA as a way for my brain to lock into 'worse case scenario' syndrome.. making things just overall worse.

Lots of people on this forum have come to my rescue (as well as Dr.C and Wade) -- trying to calm me down, and helping me with warm messages over IM's and on these forums.

To you guys, I want to say thank you.

I definitely have a problem with my penis... but I'll deal with it.. and I'll keep the forum updated with whatever i find out.

I'm heading into my doctor office next week to talk about how to get some anxiety medication.

Dark




PMMA procedure on June 2012
Inflammatory reaction required removal.
Penis current state: RECOVERED from complete PMMA removal via deglove on March 11th

Length is back, slight divot on the right side base where mass was removed, but other than that, very healthy penis
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darkstaff
So I decide to check out Dr Gelmans' website tonight. I dropped in my information into his website...

Believe it or not, its not even 30 mins later, and he is calling me on the phone.

I told him my situation, and he said that regardless of what material it is, he can remove it. The key is how it's latched onto the skin... 

I asked him about PMMA, and if he has ever done a PMMA reversal, but that term didn't seem to register with him... so I'm not confident he has.

He did tell me that he's never seen anything in the Penis migrate to lymph nodes or anywhere outside the penis.

He also said regardless of if I decide to do anything, that he would like to at least have me come in to look at me. So, I'll probably head out sometime in a month or so. 

I asked him how booked he was, and he told me he never has a backlog of patients, he likes to keep it clear, and that he works weekends to make sure that happens.

He also said that he did 2 Elist patients in the last week.

Finally, he also said that sometimes its a good idea to wait and see, sometimes if things are getting worse, its better to jump on the problem sooner.

Dark
PMMA procedure on June 2012
Inflammatory reaction required removal.
Penis current state: RECOVERED from complete PMMA removal via deglove on March 11th

Length is back, slight divot on the right side base where mass was removed, but other than that, very healthy penis
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darkstaff
So I think I finally turned the corner with my stomach.

I can breath today without any chest pain.

I felt so good I actually went outside and played golf... and there was absolutely no pain at all today from my penis.

This is going to sound crazy but right after I got off the phone with Dr Gelman last night, I felt some sort of mental "relief"... he told me that he definitely could do a PMMA reversal ... not that I'm going to ... but him saying that made me feel calm 

I took a new Probioic that I think may have really helped me stomach... that and I started on some medical grade food for intestinal inflammation support ... 

All these things have finally got my stomach feeling well ... and weirdly enough my penis too. 

I therefore am hypothesizing that these two issues are definitely linked I think there is definitely some sort of connection.

I hope I'm not jumping to any conclusions .... but this is definitely a huge step for me... and definitely something I'll explore further with my doctors, and if everything continues to improve... well, hopefully there is a lesson here for other members...

Dark
PMMA procedure on June 2012
Inflammatory reaction required removal.
Penis current state: RECOVERED from complete PMMA removal via deglove on March 11th

Length is back, slight divot on the right side base where mass was removed, but other than that, very healthy penis
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carljohnson
darkstaff wrote:

All these things have finally got my stomach feeling well ... and weirdly enough my penis too. 

I therefore am hypothesizing that these two issues are definitely linked I think there is definitely some sort of connection.



Very happy to hear you are feeling better!  However I'm not so sure on the link between your stomach and penis.  I find that hard to believe.  I think these things might be independent of one another.

Was your diet bad before the recent change?  I'm a believer that 90% of people's illness and health issues can be either corrected or improved with dietary changes.  My wife and I have felt so much better since we switched to an all natural diet.  Let me know if you have any questions on this if you think you might benefit.
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Bigben
I am also happy to hear you are feeling better, at least for now. I doubt there is much of a connection between the two ailments other than the stress caused by one can exasperate the symptoms of the other.
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darkstaff
I think you might be right BigBen.

Work up today, and I felt great because my stomach is doing well.. however my penis is back to be swollen... and I think the stomach was amplifying it..
PMMA procedure on June 2012
Inflammatory reaction required removal.
Penis current state: RECOVERED from complete PMMA removal via deglove on March 11th

Length is back, slight divot on the right side base where mass was removed, but other than that, very healthy penis
Quote 0 0
darkstaff
Haven't masterbated in forever due to the swelling... I couldn't help myself tonight since the swelling is down... the cum was yellow and smelled weird... wondering if it could be the Pheno pills.

Also, I think the overall penis size erect seems smaller... its definitely not as big as before... and seems almost like it was before the 21cc of PMMA injected... so I started asking myself 'only 1 round... and for what' ... 

There was some swelling today ... but not as bad as it was a month ago. I hope the swelling continues to go down ... the gain to stress ratio ive gone through is definitely not worth it for me.

Nite.
PMMA procedure on June 2012
Inflammatory reaction required removal.
Penis current state: RECOVERED from complete PMMA removal via deglove on March 11th

Length is back, slight divot on the right side base where mass was removed, but other than that, very healthy penis
Quote 1 0